A Blank Canvas : Starting 2026 with a different Perspective.

Feeling confused about life ? I suspect we all do. Yet you don't truly grasp it until it happens to you — until that first moment of recognition when the light bulb clicks on and you reach an "aha" realization. It's when the reality settles in, when thoughts shift and suddenly a clearer vision rises into your consciousness, as if the planets briefly align and a new perspective bursts through.

Life does seem confusing; you start to ask crucial, honest questions of yourself — some you might not even want to answer. Regrets? Yes, you have them. Concerns? Checked. Worries? Absolutely. It feels like time is racing by far too quickly, and all you want is for it to just stop for a while so you can figure out what the meaning of life truly is.

One of our greatest philosophers Socrates said “ the meaning of life is “rooted in the pursuit of virtue, wisdom, and self-knowledge rather than material success or sensory pleasure.”

I find this to be true more and more with each passing month, day, and year. Still, it remains a challenge that many of us confront as we move into a different chapter of life. Why? Because the world we inhabit often says the opposite. Our surroundings and the stimuli around us portray a different picture. As a behavior therapist, my job is to closely examine the environmental triggers that influence a person's habits and behaviors. I am not always perfect, but I rely on well-established, evidence-based procedures that, in most cases, prove effective. My purpose is to identify and modify the relevant stimuli, help the individual develop new habits, acquire useful skills, and in some situations foster more socially acceptable behavior. This may seem like a difficult task and, in some cases, it truly is. It can require weeks of careful data recording in both controlled and uncontrolled environments, revising procedures, and gathering additional measurements to ensure accuracy.

However, we do this every day in our lives. We evaluate situations, gather information, and begin the gradual process of change. Sometimes that change comes easily, and other times it proves more difficult depending on what needs to shift. For example, it’s much harder to stop smoking or to overcome a drug or alcohol addiction than it is to change smaller habits.

But when it comes to redirecting the trajectory of our thoughts and our lives, it’s not as difficult as it might appear. You’ve likely heard the saying that if you repeatedly voice negative thoughts, your brain will come to accept them and build neural pathways that reinforce those beliefs. That isn’t a myth — it’s a real, observable process.

“Repeated negative self-talk strengthens the brain's pathways for negative thinking, making it a default mode” (Psychology Today.)

This is also true if you grow up in an environment where a constant stimulus speaks negative words over you — a situation I have personally experienced. This kind of conditioning is hard to break, and the best advice I can offer from my own perspective is to find a skilled therapist who understands these specific negative patterns, particularly within a family setting. Families can wound deeply, and when relatives refuse to acknowledge the impact of their behavior, the hurt becomes a lingering residue. No matter how much you try to overlook, dismiss, or push it aside, that underlying pain remains — a quiet, nagging presence that inevitably resurfaces again and again and your family begins to convince you that you are the problem — this is not the case; you are not to blame for the situation, and their perceptions do not define your worth.

I personally believe strongly in finding a skilled therapist. I have one myself, and she’s genuinely amazing — she understands me and my quirks, and she helps me make sense of my triggers in a clear, compassionate way. Most importantly, she validates my feelings, which transforms them into a healthy part of my psychological life rather than something purely negative. That validation then supports me in making healthier choices for my mental wellness, learning new coping skills, and adjusting my environment so those triggers are less likely to pull me back into old habits. So every day is a blank canvas for me, and I can arrange my life to focus on the things that matter most to me — not what the world insists should matter.

So, try to look for the things that trigger your negative thoughts and keep you in a state of vegetation while time just continues to pass you by. Live with intentional purpose, and don’t constantly look left or right at what everyone else is doing. Keep your attention on what you are doing. You have a blank canvas every day to begin something new, to change a habit, or to start a project you may have been wanting to pursue for a long time.

Change your perspective by changing your mind.

Best,

Tony